Sunday, June 20, 2010

Change is imminent.

Writers block has been visiting my house along with the bronchitis and strep...with nothing but fevers and gross things to talk about so I decided to skip it but here is what has been on my mind this past week.

Life is starting to change in ways that I had not anticipated...well I am not an idiot so I knew they were coming I just wasn't expecting them to all come with in a years time.

The first thing will be a move. I am looking forward to this but it does come with some stress as I have a lot of stuff (OK Cyndy.... maybe it is more than a lot!!) This move will come with mixed feelings...first I am very grateful that God has allowed me to stay in the same neighborhood for the last 20 years...I have been fortunate to be surrounded by wonderful people who have helped to form my children in positive ways and it has been a gift. I have realized lately that although I love this area and am thrilled to have been here, it is time to leave. This street has many memories, good and bad. I will miss it but will look forward to making new memories.

The second thing will be my job. Any of you who know me know that I love what I do. The problem is two fold, one I can no longer survive on what I am making...this sucks but is a reality I need to face, the other is that my partner whom I love (yes Kim I mean you) is going to be leaving soon. I am thrilled for her and her husband but a bit afraid for me....who will take her place? Again if you know me well you know there is some tension at work and although I can handle the level it is at now I am not sure I can handle any more depending on who is chosen to take Kim's place (well no one can take her place..) This realization is a bit scary as it may mean change that I am not ready for.

The third thing is something that I shouldn't be worried about for awhile but I am sick and therefore allowed to wallow a wee bit....it is only one year until Jordan graduates...yes my friends this scares me as it is then that my current job description will change. For the past 14 years I have been a single mom, everything I have done, every decision has been based on what is best for my kids. This role is also coming to an end, I will always be a mom and I NEVER regret the choices I have made over the past years but soon I will be the mom of all adults...much different than toddlers and teenagers. I am not sure what kind of changes this will bring but I do know that parenting adults is different ( I do after all have 2 of them). I know I still have a way to go but it is going to be more change.

So my friends, that is what I have been thinking about...fortunately I know that God has walked me through the first half of this saga I call life and I am positive He will continue to be with me as I make some decisions about the upcoming changes.

3 comments:

  1. awww, i got teary eyed when you talked about me leaving. i'm not ready to think about that yet, although my belly tells me that this will be inevitable for me to go, but it is still a ways away. in the meantime lets concoct some alternate plans so you can either stay at the job we both love, or high tail it outta there!! we'll have to get a little crafty.... :)

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  2. I think you've already conquered over half the battle. Naming the issue, in your case plural issues, helps you to face them and be triumphant through them. You'll be fine. (I'm not sure I will be though..you will be missed in this neighbourhood!) I can hardly believe that we're supposed to be ready to call jordan an adult! Yikes! Where did the time fly? I used to babysit that guy...

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  3. For some reason I am having trouble seeing the comments...guess I need to learn a bit more huh...Thanks Cyndy, I do feel better than I did....and yes time does fly!

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