Sunday, February 19, 2012


Oppression is defined as: the exercise of authority or power in a burdensome, cruel, or unjust manner. 

I have often only applied this word to the most unfortunate of circumstances.....the victims of human trafficking, the religiously persecuted, extreme poverty especially when caused by get the idea. These people are indeed oppressed, they need our help and prayers.  As I came home from service today (guess what we spoke about), my mind was contemplating more than one meaning of the word. I am horrified by the sex trade and although I do not know how to stop it my heart goes out to all those who are unfortunate enough to be trapped in such a life. I also know that there are many other kinds of oppression and can only imagine how much grief our depravity and greed causes our loving God. 

But then I wondered, what about the oppression we place on ourselves? How about the seemingly small things that we allow satan to grab a hold of.....what does God feel when we willingly allow oppression to creep into our lives?? It is easy to feel empathy for the child who is sold into slavery, the woman who is being beaten, the church that cannot pray. What about those around us who allow alcohol or drugs to rule their life? What about the young girl so desperate to fill a void that she is promiscuous? What about the young man who is so filled with anger he is abusive to those around him?? It pains me to look at these types of situations where our hands are seemingly tied.

Over the past year, I have been on a wonderful (and painful) journey of healing. During this time God has been gracious and loving, He has taken me to some of the dark places of my life and gently nudged me to walk through them with new eyes so that I can see they no longer bind me..... and I am grateful.....but I noticed something, as I relive some of those events satan sees that they no longer have a hold on me and  so he tries to get me to grab onto something else, something that he might then use to regain the footing he has lost. If that is true in my life, then I am sure it must be the same in others as well. Confession of the of the most addictive crutches of my past is smoking. Stupid but true, I enjoyed smoking (probably always will), I was able to give up drugs and partying without a backward glance but smoking, that was another story. I did eventually quit but as I walk through some painful memories, the want for that old form of comfort is back in full force and I am surprised, I thought that was a thing of the apparently is not and it is burdensome, it is oppressive.

So you see where my mind takes me...oppression comes on so many levels. It is the feeling of having our hands tied, it comes in the form of hopelessness and pain, of not being sure how to escape  but thankfully God set his captives free, He did so during the Exodus and He continues to do so today...He has the power to untie our hands!

Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble,
   and he saved them from their distress.
He brought them out of darkness, the utter darkness,
   and broke away their chains.
Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love
   and his wonderful deeds for mankind,
for he breaks down gates of bronze
   and cuts through bars of iron. Psalm 107:13-16 NIV

Saturday, February 11, 2012 is February already??

It is hard for me to believe that it is already the second week of February, I was under the impression that once I had 'downsized' the number of entries on my calendar there would be more time?! Guess that was a fallacy of epic proportions! (yes Jordan, I used the word 'epic')

This year I have stepped away from many of my commitments to try and regain some sanity (although I think sanity may be a long shot for me).  I am still driving into Surrey twice a week, once to meet with a counsellor, and once to see my beautiful little man before heading off to my evening class as well as any board commitments with Gallery 7.  It is not like I have nothing left to do, but I have conditioned myself to keep very busy over the years so only 3 full time commitments feels a  bit light ☺  Still I have more time at home and I am finding that I am really enjoying it, I am also realizing a need to re focus the time and energy in my life.

This past year has been a that I am willing to fully share with you however I have not quite figured out how so without 'changing names to protect the innocent' so to speak....but now I am wanting to try, so I will see if I can do it. One of the surprising side effects of this year of healing is that I have, for the first time, not kept a journal throughout it....usually my first instinct is to write, however this time I have simply wanted to keep the details in my head, process them and throw them away. LOL, this is a class that requires writing everything down and I rebel and revert to point form...go figure!!

But it is February and I feel better than I have in a long time. I want to start visiting my journal again, I want to spend time at the table with pen, paper and books and study, I want to get back into God`s word and write!! 
I love life journaling, I started it years ago as my devotion time and I miss it. I guess that in the end, that is all today`s post is about...a public declaration to spend some quality time with God and get back to my love of writing....after all, it is already February!!